Church Based After School Ministry – Don’t Give In To “BORING”

We had a half-hour before the end of the day and I had four rambunctious sixth grade boys.

“Come on I have a game to teach you. Sit on the floor here with me.”

They grudgingly came and sat down as I announced that we were going to play Rhythms.

“Rhythms? What’s that!” one boy whined.

“I’ll teach you this will be fun.”

“The goal of this game is that you want to be #1. I will be the first #1 and you want to get me out of my spot by getting me to call off the wrong number or not being in rhythm.” I explained.

I proceeded to show them how to hit their folded legs with their hands, then clap, then snap, snap. They had great difficulty getting their hands to cooperate – they immediately wanted to give up.

As I snapped my right thumb and middle finger I called “Number One.” Then I snapped my left fingers and called “Number Four.” Maurice was Number Four and he called out “Number Four” but couldn’t get someone else’s number out in time.

“This is BORING” Maurice complained and the other three chimed in “BORING!”

I insisted that they could do this, I insisted it wasn’t boring – the complaints continued.

I praised them for their effort and promised it might take time but if we worked at it they would get it.  As much as I insisted that they could do this they insisted that this was BORING and we should stop, “Can’t we just play a game on the computers,” they begged.

“No! You are going to do this,” I continued to insist.

Then suddenly something happened, suddenly their hands and fingers did what they wanted them to do. Suddenly they were calling out the numbers – SUDDENLY I GOT OFF RHYTHM and had to go to the end of the circle. Raymond moved into the Number One spot.

The next thing we knew we were being called in for Family Time – the closing of the day.

I will forever remember as they headed out the door,

“HEY WANDA CAN WE PLAY RHYTHMS TOMORROW?”

KidTrek – After School Ministry: Are You Providing Relational Ministry?

  IS THE STAFF AT YOUR AFTER SCHOOL MINISTRY PREPARED/TRAINED TO RELATIONALLY MINISTER TO THE CHILDREN?

Imagine that someone came running in yelling,

“Jesus is coming, Jesus is coming!  He’s going to be over at the park

on ______________________.”

Some of you would rush out because you would really want to see Jesus.  Wow!  What an exciting afternoon.

Others of you know this is going to be a juicy afternoon.  The Pharisees are going to be there!  Will they be able to trap Jesus this time?

Can you picture Jesus sitting there on a rock?  The crowd is seated down all around him and there is a sense of excitement.

How will Jesus answer the difficult questions that the Pharisees are putting to him?

 The air is filled with tension!

Jesus is calm.  He knows that He has the answers and He gives them slowly and deliberately.  You marvel at how He never falters.  The Pharisees are never able to stump Him.

A baby in his mother’s arms begins to whimper.  He has been sick for more than a week.  She has taken him to all the doctors.  She has done everything that everyone has suggested, but still the baby has become more ill.  She looks down at the pain-filled face of her precious infant thinking,

 “Oh, if only I could have Jesus lay His hands on my baby.”

The mother looks at the crowd that is between her and Jesus.  A shiver runs down her spine; she knows what she has to do, but she is afraid.  What will people think?  What will the Pharisees say when she interrupts?

The baby whimpers again.  The mother knows she must get her baby to Jesus.

She stands and begins to move, cautiously at first.

Then a father on the other side of the crowd sees her and, looking at his sixth grade son thinks, “Oh, if I can just get my son to Jesus, perhaps He’ll pray for him; then I know he

               will be less rebellious.

Suddenly others see and join them, pushing forward with their children, wanting so badly to bring their children to Jesus.

 BUT – there is a barrier!  How do they get past those 12 men?

“Don’t bother Jesus with the children.  Can’t you see He is in an important debate right now?  Take the children away,” one of the men shouts.

“Move back!  Move back!  You are disrupting things!  People can’t hear with your crying baby. Take it to the back where it won’t be disruptive!”

Can you hear the rebukes of the disciples as they push the people back?

But listen to Jesus’ words:

“Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.  I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.”

Look what happens next!  It says so much about the importance of our ministry to the children.

Jesus took the children in His arms, put His hands on them, and blessed them.

Jesus didn’t minister from a distance.  He did not hold his hand out and bless the mass of children from afar.

No, He took the children in His arms.  He touched them!  He held them!

Can you see the mother as she lays her precious infant in Jesus’ arms?  Jesus looks gently down at him and smiles.  He softly touches the baby’s forehead.  What sweet words of blessing is Jesus praying over the child?

Watch for a few moments as Jesus takes one child after another and blesses them.

As you begin a new school year how are you going  to bless the children? What does relational ministry mean to you?

Contact me at wanda@kidtrek if you need some help to think this through. How much of a difference do you want to make in the lives of the children you serve in the coming year?

Church Based After School: WHAT IS YOUR INTENTIONAL GOAL?

I was living and working in a migrant labor camp in Texas – above are pictures of myself and husband (who I met while serving there). We were VISTA (Volunteers In Service To America) Volunteers, part of President Johnson’s war on poverty.  I was just out of college and had such huge dreams of making a difference. 

 Never will I forget the day that Lupe knocked on our door and asked if I would like to accompany her to court.  She was going to court with two boys, both 12 year olds. They had put bricks on the railroad track and derailed a train. 

 I didn’t hesitate – to get out of the heat of the Texas sun and sit idly in the back of an air-conditioned courtroom sounded like an enjoyable afternoon.  LITTLE DID I KNOW WHAT GOD HAD IN STORE FOR ME. As we entered the court I sat in the last row while Lupe went to the front to be with the boys.

The judge came in and asked the two boys to stand in front of him.  Caesar wore a filthy, worn baseball cap. Pedro stood with his head bowed and never looked at the judge.

“Take that cap off!” the judge demanded in a gruff voice.

Pedro and Caesar didn’t move.

“I told you to take that cap off!  Take it off now!.” the judge said in a slow gruff voice.

Again, neither boy moved.

Shouting this time, “Did you hear me?  I told you to take that cap off!  Do so now!”

Again, neither boy moved.

“You, you sitting out there,” the judge shouted pointing at me.  “You’ve come into our small community thinking that you know everything.  You think that you can tell us how to run our community.  Well we’ll see.  We’ll see if you have all the answers or not!  I’m putting these two boys into your custody!

He hit the bench with his gavel.  I sat there not able to move.  What had just happened?  This was supposed to be an easy afternoon, a little time out of the heat.  Now at 21 I had custody of two twelve-year olds.  What do you do with two boys who are about to become teenagers? Were they to live with us?

As we drove back to the Labor Camp Lupe and I talked about the options available to me.  We decided it would be best for the boys to spend nights with their parents and spend days with us.  Joe and Ellen, my two roommates and fellow Vista Volunteers, had a good laugh as I explained what had happened –  that is until they realized how this impacted them too.

One of the first things we learned was that Caesar wouldn’t remove his cap because he had a scalp disease and his hair was all patchy.  Joe took him to town to pick out a new, clean cap.  A daily routine was making sure his head and cap were clean.

We checked with the school to see how they were doing.  Because they were the children of migrant laborers and moved a lot the school was basically warehousing them.  We requested they be tested.  It took a little pressuring but eventually the tests were administered.  Caesar had an IQ of 69, Pedro’s was 48.

Caesar and Pedro had no idea what the consequences would be when they placed those bricks on the railroad track.  They were merely having fun trying to balance the bricks.

For the next few months I worked hard with the school and their parents figuring out what would be best for them.  In the end we were able to get them enrolled in a residential school for mentally challenged children.

I remember the day I took them to the school.  They were excited and I knew that they were going to receive training that would give them skills to function as adults on their own.

As I drove out of the school grounds I had a sense of accomplishment, a sense I had done something good. 

Caesar and Pedro were American invisible children – there was no one in their lives who cared enough or had the sophistication to get them the help they needed.  Little did the judge realize what a blessing it was for those boys when he placed them in my custody.

But as the years have passed I have often felt that those boys may have been left behind. 

Not once did I speak to them about Jesus.

What did I truly give them if I gave them the whole world but they lose their souls?  Mark 8:36

Years later, when I was concerned about the outcome of my own children the Triune God taught me what motivates most of us in what we do as we serve others. Motivation for What We Do   In the years that I served in inner cities I saw this motivation over and over again. Just one example of what I observed.

WHAT IS YOUR INTENTIONAL GOAL?

Church Based After School Ministry: What Type of Ministry Does Your Church Have?

Are you satisfied with the results of this Past year?

Look at the chart below – which type of ministry have you been a part of this past year?

If you would like to have a Youth Development Ministry read through the three following links.

What Do At Risk Kids Need?

At Risk Kids Need Secondary Nurturers

What At Risk Kids Receive from Secondary Nurtuers

Church Based After School Ministry: EXCELLENCE

A.  DILIGENCE

Romans 12:11; II Timothy 2:15

As Christians, we are called to a life of perseverance.  We are to move ahead with careful, steady  effort.  To have an excellent Center, we cannot become sluggish or indifferent.

Mediocrity IS OUR ENEMY

If you are diligent you will:

be   Challenged

get   tired

want to  give up  at times

BUT YOU WILL persevere

I had just begun as Children’s Pastor in a different church and knew that the most excellent Children’s Ministry was achieved when volunteers met monthly for training and evaluation.  For the first few months, only a few people showed up.  The fourth month, only two people were at the meeting.  I was so frustrated I sat with the two who had come and cried.  Everyone told me to give it up.  People were just too busy to come to meetings.

Matthew 18 was always going over and over in my mind – I knew God expected me to do everything I could to provide an excellent Children’s Ministry. I REFUSED TO GIVE UP. Slowly the attendance began to grow until there were 20, 30 and even 40 people turning out for these volunteer gatherings.

EXCELLENCE DEMANDS GOING THE EXTRA MILE!

B.        PRODUCTIVITY

You will bear fruit if you are excellent.

What may be some of the fruit you will produce if you have an excellent Center?

(Children catching a love for Jesus, parents coming to church, grades improving, behavior improving, life skills learned, etc.)

C.        PROGRESS

There will be continual change and growth in the program.  You will never be content with how things are going now, even if they are pretty good.

You will be growing as an individual, spiritually, emotionally and professionally.  Don’t be satisfied with where you are.  Browse through a book store at least once a month for the latest children’s books, educational books, and craft and recreational books. OR browse through the internet for books, children’s ministry ideas, parenting ideas.

Seek God daily!  Allow God to show you His truth in your innermost being.  Hunger after knowledge about child development, parenting skills and how to motivate children to learn.

LOOK BACK AT WHERE YOU’VE COME FROM
CELEBRATE WHERE YOU ARE
LOOK FORWARD TO WHERE YOU CAN GO

D.        POWER

Through God, you can meet whatever is thrown at you.  You know that apart from God you can do nothing.  However, you know in your heart that all things are possible with God.  “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”  Philippians 4:13

 E.        ABUNDANCE

You go beyond what you have to do.  You look for what you can do, even if it is tedious or means more work, longer hours, getting dirty, looking ridiculous, or taking risks.

I was leading a vacation Bible school program with hundreds of children.  Each day the children were to bring pennies, which were to go to a missionary.  My son visited the first day and at the end of the day was giving me a critique of what he had observed.

“Mom, you have to give the kids a reason to bring in their pennies that is more concrete than just helping the missionaries,” he challenged.

So I thought about it and the next morning told the kids that if they brought in a certain number of pennies, she would let the interns (six college students hired to run the summer weekday activities) do anything to me that they wanted.

The interns told the kids that at the big closing celebration, they were going to turn me into a hot fudge if enough money was raised.

The week had a new excitement to it.  I egged on the kids telling them there was no way they could raise so much money.  The kids kept saying, “Wait till Friday night.”

Friday evening arrived.  As families began arriving, I was walking around the church dressed in a long black evening dress.  The kids were aghast!  “Wanda, your dress is going to get ruined.”

“No way!  You haven’t raised enough money,” I needled.

One dad came up and told me that he had gone around his office collecting money because this was one event he wanted to make sure happened.

As you might guess, the money was raised.  I changed clothes and was brought out to sit in a wading pool while the interns poured ice cream, whip cream, chocolate syrup, nuts and cherries over me.  The church was packed with children and families.  There was a sense of electricity in the building.

I didn’t have to allow myself  to be made a fool of, but I knew the difference it would make in the week.  What I wasn’t counting on was the lasting effect it had.  Many parents came up afterward and told me how much they appreciated my willingness to go the extra mile so that their kids could be challenged and grow.

F.   RESPONSIBILITY

Excellence demands a realization that I am responsible for the outcome of what happens at the Center.  It requires awareness that one day, I will stand before the Lord and He will judge the effort I put into my ministry.

Romans 14:9-12

  G.   QUALITY

Aim for high quality in all you do.  Continually ask yourself, “Can this be done better?”

H.   HONESTY

Excellence demands that you be honest with yourself.  It is easy to fool oneself because the heart is deceitful beyond all else, Jeremiah 17:9

It is easy to think you are doing something great – when you really aren’t!

The Challenge of the Pedestal

 

Church Based After School: Emotional Needs of Children

   This is the story of a church-raised child – how much more devastating this would be for one of your kids in your after-school ministry.

Nine-year-old Marty loved Bill his Sunday school teacher.  On Sunday mornings, he could hardly wait to get to church to be with Bill.  Bill would call from time to time, and they would chat on the phone, or Bill would send him a postcard just to tell him how special he was.

One Sunday when Marty arrived at church, Bill was very excited.  He told Marty that he had just purchased a new fishing pole and was planning to go fishing the following Saturday.  He invited Marty to go with him, if his parents consented.

Marty was so excited!  After Sunday school, he made a mad dash to find his mom and see if it would be O.K.  Marty’s parents knew Bill well, and they were excited that he wanted to spend a day with their son, so they told Marty that it would be great.  Marty ran back into the room to tell Bill that he would be able to go with him.

Bill was also excited and they made arrangements regarding their day of fishing.

Marty could hardly wait until Saturday morning.  He told all his friends at school about his great Sunday school teacher who was going to take him fishing.

Friday evening rolled around and Marty’s family went out for dinner.  When they returned from dinner, there was a message on the answering machine.  It went something like this.

“Hey buddy, this is Bill.  I really hate to do this to you, but I know you’ll understand.  I was just given tickets to the UCLA – USC football game tomorrow.  I know you were really counting on going fishing but we’ll do it another time, O.K., buddy?  Love ‘ya.  See ‘ya Sunday.”

Marty’s mother told this story.

She had just read a brochure on the emotional needs of children.  After reading the brochure, Marty’s mom said that it was at that time that Marty suddenly changed his attitude about going to church.  She hadn’t made the connection before.

As we prepare to provide the most excellent ministry we can for the children whom God sends to us it is vital that we consider each child’s emotional needs.

 WHAT ABOUT THE EMOTIONAL NEEDS
OF THE CHILDREN?

Church Based After School: Opportunity To Learn From A Man Who Once Was An At-Risk Kid

 

Below is an interview which anyone who serves at-risk kids must listen to.

 

Rob Bryceson, Pastor of First Covenant Church Spokane, WA interviews a member of his church who grew up an over the top at-risk kid. It is amazing that he is alive today – even more amazing that he walks with God.

You may want to have a Kleenex handy.

We, who serve kids from dysfunctional homes, can learn what not to do from this man’s story. He accepted the Lord as a child, however due to mistakes the church made he walked away from the Lord in the week after entering the Family of God.

http://www.fccspokane.org/2012/06/sunday-06-17-2012/  

Church Based After School: Is It Worth It All?

    When you begin to wonder, IS IT WORTH IT ALL?

The giving, giving, giving of yourself.

STOP and take a few minutes to write out the little changes you have seen in kids over the past year.

Here are a few from directors I’ve trained.

Keon, 7 years old, used to get in fits and crawl up in a ball and hide in the corner. He would get mad if things didn’t go his way or if he had to do his homework. After one month of having people pray for him daily this behavior stopped. He hasn’t got in a ball like that in months. He has learned to be more responsible according to his teacher and grandmother.

WHEN YOU RUN UP AGAINST A DIFFICULTY WITH A PARTICULAR CHILD ASK AT LEAST THREE PEOPLE TO PRAY EVERYDAY FOR THE CHILD. SEND THEM A DAILY EMAIL DETAILING HOW TO PRAY.

A mother’s statement about her son with fetal-alcohol syndrome, “In all the years my boy has come to church I’ve NEVER seen him grow so much as he did this last year at the center. Thank You.”

IT WAS THE CONSISTENCY
OF DAILY BEING CHALLENGED TO FOCUS ON THE TRIUNE GOD.

We have a six-year-old who believes in God with her whole heart and is completely unashamed of the Gospel. She includes God when she is playing with her friends; I overheard her the other day laying out the plan of salvation as she and another child played. She concluded with, “At the center we learn about God. EVERYTHING is ALL about God!”

DON’T DO TUTORING AND STICK JESUS IN,
DO JESUS AND STICK TUTORING IN.

What At-Risk Kids can receive from adults committed to intentional, individualistic Discipleship.

Church Based After School Ministry: What Is/Is Not Relational Ministry?

Relational Ministry isn’t  easy – you must continually set aside what is easy and comfortable in order to minister to REAL NEEDS.

there are so many needs!!!

“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this,
that someone lay down his life for his friends.”
(John 15:12-13 ESV)

RELATIONAL MINISTRY

Relational Ministry is Deuteronomy 6:4-9 put into intentional practice.

It will never happen unless verse 4 is a desire of your heart.

“Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one.
You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your might.
(Deuteronomy 6:4-5 ESV)

I would love to hear some of your stories of relational ministry meeting REAL NEEDS.

After-School Programs – Must Be Intentional

By Wanda Parker

The Invisible Children of America need more than just a randomly run after-school program that they can drop into if they feel like it.

They need adults who know how to be intentional with them so they learn from example. Betty and Darrel Watson are two such people in the lives of Invisible Children. They recently celebrated their 46th wedding anniversary and decided to do so with the kids with whom they have been walking through life for many years now.

Why is this significant?

Because most of these kids have never known a couple who has been married that long – they didn’t think it was possible.

Below are pictures of the celebration and Betty’s comments.

Here are pictures of our two days of parties with the kids at Farm Drive for our 46th anniversary, April 14^th. The occasion was the perfect opportunity to share with the kids God’s plan for marriage in our lives.

Note that their own kids and grandkids are part of the celebration. More intentional modeling.

We made the cake last for both groups on both days and still had enough left to share with Steve and Rena who were there working on Tuesday and with Pete and Jessica who got home before we left that day. Note the beautiful rose in a water bottle – made a perfect vase! The kids weren’t sure that the picture was really of us. Marcus comment – “you looked better here” he said as he pointed at the photo.

The rose is a double delight from the yard at Farm Drive. Rena picked it and brought it in.

Marcus (Center back in light blue shirt) asked us if he could have a picture with us and so part of the kids jumped up and joined us for a picture.

Sharing with the kids God’s plan for marriage. That is our daughter Karen with the blond pony tail in the left bottom and Katy Assadi on right.

Rapt listeners!! Great kids!!

Karen and Justin are the blonds with Cassie just out of picture on the left. Karen is our daughter, Cassie and Justin our grandkids. They moved to Farm Drive to live and minister15 years ago when Cassie was 3 months old. Justin was born while they lived there.

We all listen attentively as “Mr. Watson” explains commitment and the importance of commitment in life as well as in marriage. When he asked them what commitment meant, Jasmin replied “Keeping a promise”!! One of the older kids on Tuesday replied, “It’s what we did when we signed a contract and promised to come to KidTrek everyday!” Right on kids!!

Tuesday group of older kids

Can you tell that there is only about 2/3 of the cake left from yesterday? See the pink blob in my right hand? A large rose fell off when I was holding the cake up for the picture. Fortunately it did not fall on any of the girls heads in front of me.

Cutting the cake so we can “feed each other a piece”!

We did this at the request of the kids – aren’t you going to feed each other they asked? And so we did.